ニューヨーク・タイムズのインスタグラム(nytimes) - 7月16日 03時12分

Lynda Faye is 75. Her mother, Yetta Meisel, is 99. They’re part of what experts say is a growing phenomenon: Children in their 60s and 70s, usually women, spending their retirement years caring for parents in their 90s and beyond. “I could have said to my mother, ‘Off to the nursing home with you,’ but I couldn’t say that to her,’” Lynda said. But caring for an aging parent can take a financial, emotional and physical toll on an adult child. Are you an older person caring for a parent at home? Tell us about it in the comments, and read more at the link in our bio. @_codyoloughlin_ shot this photo.

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rupadixitjoshi we live in a joint family in kathmandu, nepal. currently we are five generations under one roof. muwa, my grandmother-in-law, who is 104, mami, my mother-in-law who just turned 89, then my husband and me, both in our 60s, our son and daughter-in-law in their 40s.. and their son.. nearly two and a half years old. my younger daughter who is also in town also visits frequesntly with her daughter to be with the aging generations. muwa has always been a fiercely independent lady, not wanting to depend upon others for anything. she was married at nine and widowed at 15 with an 8-month-old son (my father in law) in her lap. so life has been a struggle for her. in the past few months her eyesight has been failing her, and she seems to have an onset of dementia too. these, and knowing that she is the oldest surviving member of her family seems to have taken the sap of her fierce zest to live. we have nurses and caretakers in shifts at home looking after both muwa and mami. muwa's frastrations at the state she is in manifest in her crankiness, depression, snapping especiialy at the caretakers. She is much more comfortable when we family members are around her, We family take turns to be with her whenever possible, especially at mealtimes. she goes on a panic mode if she does not see especially my husband, her grandson, who she is closest to in the family. so that has restricted our movements a bit, but it does not bother us too much, for the joy is having such matriarchs around. we have learnt so much from them, as have our children (our grandkids are still too small), about culture, traditions, history, values. we are taking things one step, one day at a time, and are thankful that small though our family is, we are there for each other. next week, my elder girl and her two girls and her husband are coming from UK for a month. that will be a busy full house then.. :)

bedale9 I moved into my parents new, smaller home to help them (dad physically has some issues, mom has undiagnosed (by a med pro) dementia. I have continued to work (have my own business) and have weekly assistance from one sibling. I am fortunate that I have outside interests & teach martial arts/ yoga. These mindful activities save me from complete despair especially with the hateful atmosphere created by the White House and its minions. If the ACA is repealed I will have to find something with reasonable rates so I can keep most evenings, nights and several days a week open to help my parents. At 59 I know that I will never retire due to finances. I will never be able to replace the 1k sq. ft. condo I owned for 26 years in the city/ neighborhood of my former life. I am grateful to be able to spend this time with my family, but the emotional, mental toll is becoming more evident. I’m also being told that “I’m a good daughter” but that my friends would “never jeopardize their futures” by being a care-giver to their parents. Luckily, I have no children (I couldn’t juggle helping young adults as well) and no spouse. I’m an open face sandwich who will have no one to care for me if I become incapacitated.

jgriffith58 I've been caring for my mother and my brother for over 10 years now. At first it was buying groceries and taking them to appointments, then my mom had a heart attack and moved in with my husband and me. After back surgery, knee surgery and a broken neck - with two separate surgeries and rehabs - we were running on empty. I had gotten my severely diabetic brother into an assisted living after a near death bout of sepsis, and my mother decided to move into another assisted living closer to my house. Now, two years later, my brother is in a nursing home and my mother just moved back to her assisted living after a hemorrhagic stroke in mid-April. I'm on full time duty when though she doesn't live with me. It's so hard to leave her when she wants me right beside her from sunup to sundown. The only appointments I keep for myself religiously are with my therapist and my psychiatrist. ❤️

informationforfools @tjblarson thats a tough one, my great grandmother was very aggressive and angry due to alzheimers and/dementia (i was too young to know the difference) but he r children had a mixed relationship so, the ones who had a good relationship took care of her for 6 years until she passed.... she was pretty hostile leading up to the diagnosis and that hostility was an oncoming symptom.... i guess the obligation will be determined by family values(you general family values), your cultural background and if u have other siblings. Americans are less inclined to have multiple generations in a single home, other countries/cultures believe its the only way.... i grew up in a multigenerational Italian/Irish home... so grandparents to 2nd cousins where all around growing up

m_i__l___e____s I played the part of local child for my mom when we moved here to Berkeley in the last 4 years of her life. Luckily she had money from the sale of her home and a small inheritance from her brother to keep her in a very move assisted living community. I work full time, had two tweens and a partner who resented the time I spent with my mom. The care even with assisted support was physically exhausting, socially isolates and the emotional pains my mom experienced were heartbreaking. But in the end I wouldn’t change it. My kids got to spend more time with her and experience elder life and care. I ended up leaving my husband which the strain of her care probably expedited but all for the better. A gift for sure but still hard work.

nancielairdyoung I am one of three children. The only daughter. I’m 67. I live with and care for my 89 y.o. father and he cares for me. So far he has only had a few major medical incidents, but I watch him age more each day. Recently he had to follow the ambulance I was in to the ER. As I looked at my father sitting beside me at the hospital I was reminded of times when I was a child. “I’m too old to be at the ER with you anymore,” he said. I’ll have to take better care of myself, I thought. Family. It is what we do. Today we go to the casino. He thinks I need to get out of the house. I love him.

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