Kate Oliverのインスタグラム(birchandpine) - 2月17日 23時20分

This was us, one week ago.

Before we lost Sofie to the mass they’d found six weeks earlier, the one overtaking her chest cavity, her trachea, and then Memphis kitty right after, they said it was maybe renal cancer, but he went so quickly that they barely had time for tests.
Before we lost our two sweet babes in a way that seemed as if they had decided they’d go together, because there was no other logical reason, other than they were both sick, and they were both so old, and maybe they’d kept the secret for so long and then it was as if they’d made a pact behind our backs about how it was time to leave us.

We have lost nearly half our family, and each of us is in a grief that is unlike anything we’ve ever known.
We don’t even have words, and sharing anything here feels strange, but this is our family, and it’s reduced, and they’re gone. We may not talk about them much here, but oh, were they our absolute everything. We cannot have more children, at least not for a long time, and they were that. We kept them close, like we do our daughter, not wanting to share them with the whole world.
I keep holding on to the gift in our bedroom window, when the sun came up after not sleeping, after I’d spent the night crying and getting sick with shock and grief, and there was a little cat in the condensation, and then behind him, a dog. Clear as the sunrise that lit up the beads of water on the window. They were jumping, leaping, together.

I woke this morning, it’s been five days since we lost Sofie and Memphis. I opened my mouth to ask where Sofie was, as Whiskey pranced around the kitchen, and then remembered.

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