スカイラー・カーギルさんのインスタグラム写真 - (スカイラー・カーギルInstagram)「lately i’ve been doing alright. juggling, working out, making and releasing music. i toss my priorities back and forth like an orange in my hand and i feel.. calm. i have lost a lot since january but i have also gained a sense of wonder, creativity, and motivation as my body has adjusted to this change. . . i don’t believe in a singular god but i do believe my relatives and friends who have passed are somewhere out there, in some sort of energy, and i want to make them proud. i always said i’d carry their lights, and i will, even if never as bright as the stars their souls showed me. fireworks, awe, wisdom. . . sometimes i wake up to a sense of absolute certainty that i am making the right choices. sometimes i wake up and realize my hands are matches and i reach toward that which is uncertain with the knowledge that if i will burn it down, i. will. burn. it. all the way down. maybe that’s what being bipolar is like, maybe it is not - i am simply existing with these chemicals and these choices to continue moving forward. . . this past month (or two) was chock full of unprecedented loss. the ocean of grief that has come to pull me into its riptide has been tempting. i pulled back and met resistance i didn’t know how to handle. do you know that feeling of “if i move, i won’t move at all”? do you know that feeling of “if i try, maybe i’m trying too hard”? that is a persistent theme in my life that i am choosing to not make a constant. i’m going to release an important song soon - one i wrote when i knew no home and never wanted to go back to that place. . . i know home now. i know love and safety. i look forward to sharing that with you. . #ftm #love #transandhappy #bipolar #song #trans #lifeisalright #itsokaytocry」2月22日 11時43分