Grace Bonneyのインスタグラム(designsponge) - 3月28日 07時17分

[Content warning: disordered eating] This week has been tricky. I’m spending time away from social media + it’s helped me get in better touch with my feelings about so many things. But on Monday *not* having my social media distractions was hard. I saw some photos of me taken for a story and barely recognized myself. All I could see was a different weight, older face, and a person I felt like I didn’t know. I felt intense shame about my jeans being too tight. Then shame about feeling ashamed in the first place. I’ve worked hard to create new voices in my head to balance out the disordered ones, but on Monday that old voice came back with a vengeance. I spiraled with thoughts of things I could do to lose weight, like I’ve done for too much of my life. But then I did something that would NOT have happened without this new found lack of distraction: I took myself to Target to face those feelings head on. (This is not a sponsored post, btw) I spent an hour and a half in the dressing room confronting negative voices. It was an uncomfortable hour and a half, but I think that because I *didn’t* have the distraction of social media, I was able to stay present and face those voices head on. I tried on 40 pairs of jeans in 4 different sizes without looking in the mirror. I made myself focus on how I *felt* first, not how I looked. I narrowed it down to 3 pairs, then looked in the mirror, and found myself staring at someone I realized I needed to do a better job of knowing and appreciating. I wasn’t miraculously cured, but I left with pants that helped me feel better about my body and the understanding that I need to start loving myself at 37, just as I am. I wanted to post this today because I know a lot of us talk privately about eating disorders and are worried to discuss them in public. While I may not be 💯 at peace with myself, I am so grateful for time and the understanding that comes with it. As I start working on a new book this week related to the wisdom that comes with age, this moment feels especially poignant, so I just wanted to share for anyone else out there who might be feeling that way I did this week. You’re not alone ♥️

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vanessa.binder Thanks for sharing ❤️ We all need to remind ourselves that we live in a matrix of images ~ everyday since the advent of television we've been bombarded with stupid concepts and invented things to create a collection of myths. (We have 'television' literally in our pockets today). We've been programmed. We will try desperately to match our lives and appearance to the images we've been bombarded with. We're completed submerged in ideas that don't belong to us. Our heads are spinning in agony with bad thoughts and weird feelings so we can go and buy ourselves a 'new' pair of something to make us feel better and if we don't post on Instagram every single day we feel we are not working hard enough ~ only through HARD WORK you might achieve success ~ we believe in it (this is another invented thing to keep us slaving away). Please don't get me wrong. I'm not judging you. You are exposing yourself here and that's a great thing and it resonates within every single one of us. We need to wake up - me included. Lots of love xx

ellendignazio I struggled with eating disorders in my teens and early 20's (I am 47)... It is something I always have to 'check in' with myself... I also have a nightly routine of serums, neck creams, eye creams etc... and I thought to myself the other day..my husband doesn't feel the need to do any of these things.. like nightly face routines or spending time picking out an outfit because of major bloating... I got angry but then I said ..I am doing these things because they make me feel good, not because I think I have to... always for me, not for anyone else!

tipatkins At 47 I am ever so slowly getting comfortable with my body (it’s the one we get so why hate it is a hard thing to believe when I grew up wit years of my mother’s voice in my head “you’re fat” - every. single. time she sees me. She still does it.) I did a 5 week course by @stasiasavasuk in 2017 that not only taught me how to dress my body and authentically but it also taught me to start to learn to truly love my body & myself. I couldn’t recommend it more for this journey you’re on. x

jodivanproeyen I adore this post.....I feel those same feelings at 47. My new mantra when those voices ring in my head, " just love yourself through it". Yep there was a time when I looked better than I do now.....but I was also young and immature. Now there is a brain and moxy and depth and experience that I worked hard for. Do I want my body the way it used to be....well, yes. But we have to love ourselves on the way there too.

reblarts I literally just posted similar feelings in a story on another account of mine. 34 and feeling like I’ve wasted so much time hating my body, and allowing comparisons to others rule my emotional health. ED are very secretive, and I’m slowly becoming more open- partially because I recognize how negatively it is impacting me to keep it inside.

littlemisswannabesmommapam Rock on and stay strong.....make peace with yourself...remember your a good person and that what counts...when you decide to be happy just the way you are....everything will follow...you are not alone...and your in charge of you...

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