ジ・オニオンのインスタグラム(theonion) - 5月12日 03時00分

“This one looks decent enough, and it has a pretty good number of flowers,” said local man Connor Wurster, who will reportedly rely upon the deep affection of the woman who gave birth to him to pick up the slack for the assortment of peach roses, stargazer lilies, and baby’s breath he purchased with five minutes to spare before leaving to visit his parents for the weekend. “Plus, it comes with a vase. I don’t know, maybe I should get some chocolates, too [in order to avoid having to depend so completely upon a mother’s limitless and profound love for her child being truly eternal].” #TheOnion

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